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  • A Picture Perfect Marriage: Man Marries a Picture of Himself on Random People Who Married Inanimate Objects

    (#11) A Picture Perfect Marriage: Man Marries a Picture of Himself

     

    It's always good to have self-confidence, and people really should learn to love themselves and all, but this man is taking it to an extreme. 39-year-old Chinese man Liu Ye married a life-sized cutout photo of himself wearing a red bridal gown. Ye said he was dissatisfied with reality so he married himself. That makes perfect sense.

    The wedding took place in the square of Guanzhou Village before friends and weirded out local villagers. All of the ancient Chinese wedding traditions were honored including the bride kowtowing to heaven and earth, to ancestors and to the elderly aged 90 and over. Bride and groom made the traditional rounds of toasting guests during the banquet.

    Remarked one guest, "It is a real grand wedding except that the bride is a photo." Oh, just that one little thing?

    Self described as "an angry Chinese youth at best," Liu Ye denies he is gay but does admit to being "a little bit narcissistic." Just a little!?! Ye said, "marrying myself is a process of deconstructing and reconstructing myself. I make use of the wedding to reconsider opposite-sex marriage. My behavior seems ridiculous, but I am traditional and conservative in heart so the wedding ceremony is traditional."

    Yeah, totally conservative and traditional... he's just crazy enough to fit in with the conservatives here in the States!

     
  • She'll Never Say No: Man Marries Sex Doll on Random People Who Married Inanimate Objects

    (#13) She'll Never Say No: Man Marries Sex Doll

    When Davecat married a sex doll in 2000, he said "She provides me with a lot of things that I can't get out of an organic partner, like...quiet." Not to be rude, but there's a good chance Dave spent many a night with nothing but quiet. When you make the cognitive decision to marry a sex doll, it's an easy jump to assume the ladies are banging down your door on the regular.

    So you go ahead and put the blame on the fact that women "talk to much" and not that you can't get a girl with a pulse.

    Source

  • Her Heart Is a Stereo: Woman Marries a Radio on Random People Who Married Inanimate Objects

    (#14) Her Heart Is a Stereo: Woman Marries a Radio

    A British woman who goes by the name "Emma," because she wishes to remain anonymous, says she is in love with a hi-fi system which she called Jake. Jake, she says, is "solid, reliable and beautiful". She repairs "him" when he goes wrong, and "makes love" to him on average twice a day.

    "Emma" is a bit of a loner but says, "I would like to meet more people and to have friends," she says, "but I just think it is too difficult now. I am scared they will reject me.

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  • Thumb of A Modern Mobile Fairy Tale: Man Marries His Smart Phone video

    (#1) A Modern Mobile Fairy Tale: Man Marries His Smart Phone

    Los Angeles filmmaker Aaron Chervenak claimed he wanted to make a point about the emotional connection people have with their phones, but he was probably just sick of his parents bothering him about finding a girlfriend. In the name of ~art~, Chervenak eloped with his phone to the Little Las Vegas Chapel.

    He explained, "If we’re gonna be honest with ourselves, we connect with our phones on so many emotional levels. We look to it for solace, to calm us down, to put us to sleep, to ease our minds, and to me, that’s also what a relationship is about. In a sense, my smartphone has been my longest relationship." What a catch.
  • Talk About a Family Tree: Bollywood Actress Marries a Tree on Random People Who Married Inanimate Objects

    (#8) Talk About a Family Tree: Bollywood Actress Marries a Tree

    Bollywood movie star and former Miss World Aishwarya Rai participated in an ancient Hindu ritual ceremony in which the bride spiritually marries a tree.

    The ritual is allegedly to help overcome differences in the couple's astrological charts – disparities which traditional Hindus believe have negative consequences on marriage. Under this ancient belief, Rai is considered a 'manglik' because her chart bears the planet Mars, and she must be 'married' to a peepal tree, a banana tree or a silver or golden idol of the Hindu god Vishnu in order to overcome the devastating effects being a 'manglik' could have on her impending nuptials.

    Rai was also hit with a lawsuit, so it didn't take away ALL bad luck; she faced a civil lawsuit for practicing the 'untouchability' service, which is associated with the caste system, because such ceremonies are in violation of the Indian constitution and are deemed offensive to women.

    Source
  • He Choo Choo Chooses It: Man Marries Steam Engine Train on Random People Who Married Inanimate Objects

    (#2) He Choo Choo Chooses It: Man Marries Steam Engine Train

    Joachim A has a thing for the inner workings of technical objects, which is great since he works as a repair man... but not so great for his spouse, a steam locomotive.

    "A love affair could very well begin with a broken radiator," Joachim says, "Repair jobs have often led to infidelity in the past." But they always seem to plow through it and stay together somehow.

    He stresses that people like him (the people on this list) aren't just fetishists. "For some people, their car becomes a fetish which they use to put themselves in the limelight. For the objectum-sexual, on the other hand, the car itself – and nothing else – is the desired sexual partner, and all sexual fantasies and emotions are focused on it." Needless to say, this guy loves to fix things.

    He realized he had a "thing" for things when he was 12. He's currently 45. He loves his train like he would a person, according to him: "you can reveal yourself to an object partner in an intimate way, in a way that you would never reveal yourself to any other person...[even] experience sexuality together."

    [insert sex-train pun here]

    Source

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