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(#1) Shirley
Rumack: Can you fly this plane, and land it?
Ted Striker: Surely you can't be serious.
Rumack: I am serious... and don't call me Shirley.
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(#2) A Hospital
Rumack: You'd better tell the Captain we've got to land as soon as we can. This woman has to be gotten to a hospital.
Elaine Dickinson: A hospital? What is it?
Rumack: It's a big building with patients, but that's not important right now.
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(#3) The Wrong Week
Steve McCroskey: Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit sniffing glue.
(again in the film)
Steve McCroskey: Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit amphetamines.
(and again)
Steve McCroskey: Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit smoking.
(later)
Steve McCroskey: Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit drinking.
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(#4) Roger
Roger Murdock: Flight 2-0-9'er, you are cleared for take-off.
Captain Oveur: Roger!
Roger Murdock: Huh?
Tower voice: L.A. departure frequency, 123 point 9'er.
Captain Oveur: Roger!
Roger Murdock: Huh?
Victor Basta: Request vector, over.
Captain Oveur: What?
Tower voice: Flight 2-0-9'er cleared for vector 324.
Roger Murdock: We have clearance, Clarence.
Captain Oveur: Roger, Roger. What's our vector, Victor?
Tower voice: Tower's radio clearance, over!
Captain Oveur: That's Clarence Oveur. Over.
Tower voice: Over.
Captain Oveur: Roger.
Roger Murdock: Huh?
Tower voice: Roger, over!
Roger Murdock: What?
Captain Oveur: Huh?
Victor Basta: Who?
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(#5) Stop Calling Me
Rumack: I won't deceive you, Mr. Striker. We're running out of time.
Ted Striker: Surely there must be something you can do.
Rumack: I'm doing everything I can... and stop calling me Shirley!
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(#6) Fly A Plane
Elaine Dickinson: Ladies and gentlemen, this is your stewardess speaking... We regret any inconvenience the sudden cabin movement might have caused, this is due to periodic air pockets we encountered, there's no reason to become alarmed, and we hope you enjoy the rest of your flight... By the way, is there anyone on board who knows how to fly a plane?
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(#7) Nervous
Hanging Lady: Nervous?
Ted Striker: Yes.
Hanging Lady: First time?
Ted Striker: No, I've been nervous lots of times.
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(#8) Like My Men
Young Boy Passenger: Cream?
Young Girl Passenger: No thank you, I take it black… like my men.
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(#9) Baseball Cards
Rex Kramer: Striker, listen, and you listen close: flying a plane is no different than riding a bicycle, just a lot harder to put baseball cards in the spokes.
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(#10) Make A Guess
Rumack: Captain, how soon can you land?
Captain Oveur: I can't tell.
Rumack: You can tell me. I'm a doctor.
Captain Oveur: No. I mean I'm just not sure.
Rumack: Well, can't you take a guess?
Captain Oveur: Well, not for another two hours.
Rumack: You can't take a guess for another two hours?
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(#11) Not Important
Elaine Dickinson: You got a letter from headquarters this morning.
Ted Striker: What is it?
Elaine Dickinson: It's a big building where generals meet, but that's not important.
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(#12) Drinking Problem
Ted Striker: It was at that moment that I first realized Elaine had doubts about our relationship. And that, as much as anything else, led to my drinking problem. (tries to drink and just splashes it all on the side of his face)
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(#13) He's In Charge
Steve: He'll never bring it down in this soup. Never! Not one chance in a million.
Rex Kramer: I know. I know. But it's his ship now, his command; he's in charge, he's the boss, the head man, the top dog, the big cheese, the head honcho, number one...
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(#14) A Big Tylenol
Reporter: What kind of plane is it?
Johnny: Oh, it's a big pretty white plane with red stripes, curtains in the windows and wheels and it looks like a big Tylenol.
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(#15) You Ever Been
Captain Oveur: Joey, have you ever been in a... in a Turkish prison?
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(#16) Lasagna
Rumack: What was it we had for dinner tonight?
Elaine Dickinson: Well, we had a choice of steak or fish.
Rumack: Yes, yes, I remember, I had lasagna.
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(#17) Mister Rogers
Steve McCroskey: I need the best man on this. Someone who knows that plane inside and out and won't crack under pressure.
Johnny: How about Mister Rogers?
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(#18) A Second Cup
Mrs. Hammen: Jim never has a second cup of coffee at home.
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(#19) Good Luck
Rumack: I just want to tell you both good luck. We're all counting on you.
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(#20) Gladiators
Captain Oveur: Joey, do you like movies about gladiators?
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(#21) A Twister
Johnny: Auntie Em, Uncle Henry, Toto! It's a twister! It's a twister!
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(#22) A Grown Man
Captain Oveur: You ever been in a cockpit before?
Joey: No sir, I've never been up in a plane before.
Captain Oveur: You ever seen a grown man naked?
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(#23) Me John
Rex Kramer: All right, I'll need three men up at the tower. You, Neubauer. You, Macias.
Johnny: Me, John, big tree!
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The Airplane! is a famous American parody film in 1980, the film is a disaster film genre, and borrows the plot and the central characters of the film Zero Hour! This movie is known for its use of surreal humor and fast-paced farce, which includes a variety of obscure humor such as visual and verbal puns. A series of quotes are impressive.
This page randomly displays 23 items, there are the funniest quotes from the movie Airplane!, such as Shirley, A Hospital, The Wrong Week. You can find more quotes. And welcome to leave a message.
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