Random Tips About How To Successfully Flirt (12 items)

• (#1) Have A Sense Of Humor

  Yes, we have a biological need for sex. But we also have a biological need to laugh, and these days, it can be tough to say which is more important or central to the survival of our species. Injecting a bit of humor into your flirtations makes you instantly more likeable, plus a good laugh can diffuse awkwardness and ratchet down any tension that might be in the air. Be careful, though, when using humor in your flirting. The wrong joke - or a joke that hurts more than it amuses, regardless of who it's about - could send the exact opposite message you were hoping to impart.
• (#2) Compliment Them

  Even if apathetic is your type, consider giving out a few compliments while flirting. No one is immune to a genuine, thoughtful compliment. In fact, we have a biochemical reaction when people say nice things about us. When someone gives us a flattering remark, the reward center of our brain lights up. Paying a potential mate a compliment is an ideal way to flirt and get your message across. Just avoid the cheesy, lame, and overused compliments out there. Say something genuine - and in an appropriate moment - and you will make a lasting and positive impression.
• (#3) Women: Be Direct; Men: Ask Questions

  Men respond when their partners or potential partners are direct and to the point. They like to hear what a partner's intentions are up front, leaving little room for ambiguity or guesswork. Alternately, women respond more to innocent questions and general conversation-starters. Oh, and those trite pickup lines? No one responds to those.
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  (#4) Maintain Eye Contact

  We are visual creatures turned on by visual stimuli. Studies have shown that locking eyes with someone for more than just a quick glance can enhance that person's appeal. When we maintain prolonged eye contact with another person, there is a level of intimacy generated that can feel remarkably familiar, comfortable, and even sensual. There are different types of eye contact, but any kind of lengthy gazing into one another's eyes can be extremely intense. It's best to employ longer periods of eye contact when you know the other person well, or you know you both have the same intentions.
• (#5) Focus On Positives In Your Conversation

  At the end of the day, kindness really does make you more appealing. This may seem elementary, but it's important to note that flirting should focus on the positives and kind interactions. Hearing someone's sad story right out of the gate is not a way to invite interest from other people, even if you're goal is to land a pity date or make someone feel sorry for you. Genuine attraction and interest tend to stem from initial conversations that revolve around happier, or at least less loaded, topics. So, when flirting, go for the feel-good story rather than the Debbie Downer monologue or coworker teardown spiel that's going to bring the whole room down.
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  (#6) Read The Signals

  You will only be successful at flirting if you can read the signals of the other person. If someone is being unresponsive or giving half-there replies to your attempts to start a conversation, take the clue, be respectful, and move on. If someone is maintaining eye contact, asking questions, and leaning in, continue flirting, you flirt master! Also, if you're encountering a lot of disinterest, ask yourself if you're sending the right signals. Many times, we think we're being clear and flirty and compelling when our signals are really muddy and vague. A good flirter knows how to read the room... and themselves.
• (#7) Tease In A Playful Manner

  When it comes to flirting, few people like to be toyed with or negged. Some gentle, good-natured teasing, however, is different. Used properly, a lighthearted tease can be an effective means of wooing and seduction. But remember: teasing is all about intention, and it is the intention we respond to... or don't. Make it clear you are having fun, and you want to have more fun, and don't rely on snarkiness.
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  (#8) Keep Your Posture Straight

  During any exchange - verbal or nonverbal - we are sending off clues about who we are, our intentions, and our levels of interest. This is especially true when we're flirting. Our bodies broadcast signals before we even open our mouths, so if you're looking to improve your flirting, you want to send the right message. You want to come across as confident, cool, and comfortable; these are universal qualities to which we're all drawn. The best way to emit these vibes is to keep your posture straight: stand with an erect spine, sit up in your chair instead of leaning over or in, and avoid slouching.

  Once you have started a conversation with a person of interest, match their posture. If they lean in, you lean in. If they sit back, do the same. This subconsciously shows you understand them and are on the same page. 
• (#9) Touch Their Arm

  Touch is one of those things that needs to be handled with a bit of finesse. It's rarely advisable to touch strangers, especially in ways that feel overly familiar or too pushy. Yet when you're flirting and can sense a level of interest coming from the other party, a well-placed hand and a light touch can speak volumes. Placing a hand briefly on their arm or "accidentally" brushing their arm as you reach for something can send signals that you're interested but also respectful of boundaries. And while this should go without saying, stop touching someone if they ask you to stop or send clear indicators they aren't interested.
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  (#10) Buy Them A Warm Drink

  There's something to be said for skipping the bar scene and grabbing a cup of coffee on your next date. A Yale study found that we often associate warm drinks with feelings of coziness, comfort, and generosity. A warm drink, at least on a biological level, demonstrates that the person who bought us the drink cares about us. And the feelings we project are more caring, too. "Physical warmth can make us see others as warmer people," the study found, "but also cause us to be warmer - more generous and trusting - as well."
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  (#11) Wear Red

  Both men and women respond to the color red. Men find it the most sexually desirable color a woman can wear. Women, too, are more often drawn to men who wear red. Part of this is cultural, as we're often programmed to see red as the color of passion, strength, and status. It's biological as well. In the animal kingdom, red is associated with dominance and "alpha" behaviors. When you wear red while flirting, you are upping your game at the instinctual level. 
• (#12) Tilt Your Head

  Oftentimes, when people are interested in us, we are interested in them. Science has shown us that expressing such interest during flirting is an excellent way to open up communication and pique interest levels. On a biological level, we tend to be drawn to "classically" male and female characteristics, depending on what our sexual preferences may be. According to one study, "Women are more alluring if they angle their head forwards, so they have to look slightly upwards. In contrast, men become more masculine if they tilt their head back and look slightly down their nose."

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