Random Things That Happen In Every Frickin' Pirates Of Caribbean Movi (14 items)

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  (#1) Jack Sparrow Gets Slapped By A Woman

  Jack has a way with the ladies, and it certainly catches up with him. When he and Will first visit Tortuga, he gets slapped several times (some of which he deserved, some... he probably also deserved). It's pretty hilarious, but when you get to the sequel the slapping continues.

  They try to make it comical, but it ends up being far too self-referential on a one-note joke. They do bring it back to good effect during On Stranger Tides, when during a mermaid attack one swims up to Jack and slaps him in the face. It's so unexpected, it kind of works.
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  (#2) The Crew Of The Black Pearl Turns Against Jack Sparrow

  Jack Sparrow may be brilliant, but pirates are a treacherous lot. The inciting incident for the first film's story sees Jack deposed from his captaincy by a mutiny. Of course, after he gets his ship back and is captain again in Dead Man's Chest, Elizabeth leaves him to die at the tentacles of the Kraken, and the crew is basically fine with it.

  Then, at conclusion of At World's End, the crew ditch him to go off and find the Fountain of Youth all on their own, only to discover Jack took the most important part of the map for himself. With the amount of back and forth Jack has with his crew, it's amazing he didn't fire them all and hire some new shipmates ages ago.
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  (#3) The Rum Is Always Gone

  In a now famous scene from the first movie, Elizabeth and Jack are left to die on a small island. Elizabeth soon discovers the island is a cache for rum smugglers, with much of their wares still tucked away. While Jack just wants to get drunk, Elizabeth decides to burn everything to create a smoke signal. This leads to Jack's beloved quote, "But why is the rum gone?"

  It's proven so popular, throughout the sequels almost every time Jack has tried to get a swig of his favorite drink, it's nowhere to be found. It was a funny line in 2003, but by the third time the rum was gone the sheen had worn away. It's the Caribbean. Surely at some point, they'd come across some rum.
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  (#4) There's Always A Weird, Immortality Curse Afflicting A Crew Of Pirates

  The first movie revolved around the Black Pearl's crew getting cursed by an Aztec treasure. The afflicted pirates become immortal, and look like skeletons in moonlight. Overall, pretty cool stuff. In Dead Man's Chest and At World's End, not only is Jack trying to escape a supernatural debt to protect his soul, but Davy Jones and his crew are cursed to live as immortal man/sea creature hybrids.

  The fourth film features Blackbeard's crew, who are essentially (immortal) zombies in bad makeup. With four films of supernatural crews, it's easy to think the entire Atlantic is full of undead pirate crews afflicted with supernatural maladies, which also seems to be the case in Dead Men Tell No Tales. Is it too much to ask for a singular regular crew of pirates?
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  (#5) Someone Is Locked In A Jail Cell

  Pirates are, by definition, outlaws. So it stands to reason that someone, at some point, is going to get caught and locked up. Still, we really don't need to see it in every movie. In the first film, Jack Sparrow gets locked up three times. In the sequel, it's Will and the crew of the Pearl that get put in irons. The third film literally sees Jack stuck in a place called Davy Jones' locker, and the fourth begins with Mr. Gibbs on trial, only for Jack Sparrow to be taken prisoner by both the English Royal Navy and Blackbeard.

  It's can be a solid plot device to have someone locked up, and it's bound to happen to pirates sometime, but repeating prison scenes in every film have resulted in some seriously diminishing returns. 
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  (#6) Jack Sparrow Betrays Someone's Trust

  Jack can give as good as he gets when it comes to the duplicity department. In the first movie, he plays Jack and Barbossa against each other, switching sides scene to scene to serve his interests. It may seem like he's betraying everyone, until you realize that it's all to get what he wants in the end: the Black Pearl.

  In the sequels, Jack's betrayals get more hardcore. He gives up Will to Davy Jones in Dead Man's Chest, and then disregards every promise he makes to Angelica in On Stranger Tides. Jack plays the long game, and he's willing to give up some short term confidence in order to win in the end. Honestly, by the end of the third film audiences are left wondering why people keep the guy around. He's just a self-interested jerk. 
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  (#7) Barbossa Eats An Apple

  When Captain Hector Barbossa was cursed by Aztec gold, he lost the ability to enjoy life or his senses. In a fantastic scene in the first film, he watches Elizabeth Swann eat and tries to gain some vicarious joy from her indulgence. He then proclaims the first thing he'll do when he's cured is eat, "a whole bushel of apples."

  In fact, when he "dies" at the end of the first film, we see an apple fall from his hand (which is weird, since he was just in a sword fight, but whatever). And sure enough, the first time we see him back from the dead in Dead Man's Chest, he's snacking on an apple. He's also seen eating apples aboard ships in the subsequent two films. Now, pirates had a major problem with scurvy back in the day, mostly because it was incredibly difficult and expensive to keep fruit fresh on long ocean voyages. So, either Barbossa is incredibly well connected or he has access to a magical locker of replenishing apples. 
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  (#8) There's A Strange Item Central To Finding Treasure

  In every Pirates film, the way to get to whatever treasure is driving the story is through a supernatural item. The first three films feature Jack's compass, which points to whatever the holder desires most. Dead Man's Chest also features a key to a box holding the disembodied beating heart of Davy Jones.

  On Stranger Tides focuses on the hunt for Fountain of Youth, which requires the tear of a mermaid in order to work, like you do. The problem with these increasingly ludicrous items is that they begin to stretch credulity. Seriously, how do people even know about them in the first place? By the time we reach the fourth film, it's just kind of glossed over and characters never explain how they know what they know.
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  (#9) The Black Pearl Is Stolen

  Jack's quest to get the Pearl back in the first film is compelling and interesting. When he eventually reclaims it at the end, we get to see him be the captain of the ship for a whole movie. Well, until it's taken by the Kraken at the end of Dead Man's Chest.

  The entire first act of the third film involves everyone rescuing Jack and the Pearl, only for Barbossa to go running off with the ship at the end. And the entirety of On Stranger Tides sees the Pearl stuck in a bottle, stolen by Blackbeard. After a while, it really just seems like getting a new ship would be easier than retaking the Pearl again and again.
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  (#10) There's Always A Young, Naive Boy

  Jack Sparrow, Barbossa, and Elizabeth Swann are all characters with a lot of cunning. Will Turner, on the other hand, is well known for his naiveté. In the first film he basically knows nothing, always says something so innocent it's embarrassing, and tries to do the right thing. After Will became a total badass when he took Davy Jones' place as captain of the Flying Dutchman, the series needed another character who could play the straight man next to Sparrow's chaotic neutral. On Stranger Tides features a missionary (hard to get more pure than that), who's always trying to do the right thing during an expedition with some very unsavory characters. While the juxtaposition of innocence and guile was interesting at first, it's a trope that becomes increasingly annoying as the series goes on. 
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  (#11) A Woman Pretends To Be Someone Else

  The Caribbean is a man's world, but Elizabeth Swann is a cunning woman who doesn't play by the rules. In the first film, she claims her last name is Turner to the crew of the Pearl in order to disguise the fact she's a governor's daughter. In Dead Man's Chest, she pretends to be male member of a ship so she can get passage to find Jack. In the third film, the trope begins to wear ragged as she impersonates the sea goddess Calypso. After a while, it'd be great just to see her shine as herself in one of these films.

  Oh, and let's not forget that at the start of On Stranger Tides, Penelope Cruz's Angelica pretends to be Jack Sparrow. Because... it's fun to see her play dress up?
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  (#12) True Love Is Always Interfering With Plans

  A huge element of the original Pirates trilogy is the love between Will Turner and Elizabeth Swann. It's their connection that helps foil the cursed Black Pearl's plans to pretty much rule the Caribbean. In the films, Will and Elizabeth are (for the most part) trying to clear each other's names so they can get married, often to the detriment of MacGuffin finding.  

  On Stranger Tides features a romance between a missionary and a mermaid, and it's somehow even more boring than it sounds. Love is all well and good, but not every movie needs romance, especially when we're dealing with blood thirsty pirates. After a while, it's hard not to wonder why the cutthroats don't just kill the moony-eyed lovers and move on.
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  (#13) Everyone's After A Magical MacGuffin, For... Reasons

  For a franchise featuring pirates, the characters almost never go after actual treasure. Yes, the first one is all about cursed Aztec gold, but after that it becomes about the hunt for Davy Jones' heart. Then, the third one revolves around unlocking the power of a sea goddess to fight the British Navy and On Stranger Tides chronicles the search for the Fountain of Youth. The most unbelievable thing about the franchise may be that after The Curse of the Black Pearl, there's very little actual pirating done.
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  (#14) Jack Gets Marooned (Or Maroons Someone)

  One of the most interesting elements from the first movie was Jack Sparrow's relationship with Barbossa. Barbossa marooned Jack on an island after his mutiny, Jack escaped through dumb luck, and now wants to use the single shot they left him to kill his ex-first mate.

  In the second film, Jack once again finds himself stuck on an island, afraid of venturing out onto the sea where Davy Jones can catch him. In At World's End, Jack is stuck in Davy Jones' locker, and only escapes with the help of his friends. On Stranger Tides, on the other hands, actually sees Jack marooning someone else, the same way Barbossa left him to die. After all that Jack has been through, that last one seems remarkably cold.

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