Random Characters Whose Body Proportions Would Probably Kill Them (20 items)

(#3) Gru
- Despicable Me, Despicable Me 2
Gru, the most notable non-Minion character from Despicable Me, is obviously not designed to look like a well-balanced man. The character designers may have taken that a bit literally, however, because Gru does not look like a man who could stay on his feet for very long. His body is quite wide at the top and consistently tapers down to the bottom, concluding with what could only be described as “absurdly weak ankles.”
Gru is practically triangular, and anyone with triangle experience can tell you that they’re not fantastic at balancing on their points. At best, Gru would regularly break his ankles, and at worst, he wouldn’t be able to stand in the first place.
(#18) Power Girl
- Superman/Batman: Public Enemies, DC Universe
Power Girl is basically a version of Supergirl from another reality. Apparently, that’s a reality where the laws of physics don’t apply. Power Girl’s design has drawn criticism for decades, mostly for her costume’s “boob window,” which puts her ample bosom on constant display.
Since Power Girl spends the majority of her time fighting powerful juggernauts, there’s just no way that everything would stay in place as well as it does. In reality, she’d have to constantly readjust her costume every time one popped out. Also, she looks like she must suffer from near constant back pain.
(#4) Homer Simpson
- The Simpsons, Stand Up to Cancer, Do the Bartman, The Simpsons Movie, The Simpsons
The Simpsons is a refuge where people go for laughter, not for realism. However, Homer Simpson’s weird physiology is frankly bizarre when applied to real life, so it bears mentioning. In short, Homer’s eyes are way too big for his head and face.
On the one hand, his skull could have ridiculously large eye sockets, but that doesn’t say much for the structural integrity of a face that is constantly getting bashed by things. Alternatively, Homer’s eyes could just be oversized, which means they’d be in constant danger of popping out. D’oh!
(#11) The Hydra Has Too Many Heads To Support Itself

The Hydra is a really fun mythological concept, but the beast's design is not really workable design in the real world. A Hydra’s shtick is growing two heads whenever one is cut off, which often leaves the beast with dozens of heads. However, bodies are designed to hold exactly one head at a time.
Imagine the strain on anything’s body if you started adding extra heads all over the place. The Hydra is no exception, and would quickly collapse on itself before it managed to grow even a half-dozen heads. It’s not growing any extra upper bodies or legs, after all. Somebody needs to hail this Hydra an ambulance.
(#1) Arnold Would Have Destroyed His Mother During Birth

Arnold, from Hey Arnold!, might have been able to get through life alright. Might. His mother, on the other hand, wouldn’t have a chance of surviving childbirth, as his gigantic, football-shaped head would surely ruin her body on the way out.

That lopsided dome would also mean that Arnold himself would have to spend his life wearing a neck brace or risk snapping his spine and winding up paralyzed at the slightest provocation. Even wearing his trademark hat would be a risky move for the tragedy waiting to happen.
(#17) Nabooru

The Legend of Zelda series is not a video game franchise that fans expect rampant sexism from, but it certainly showed up in the design of at least one female character. In Ocarina of Time, Link encounters the Gerudo people, who are led by a mysterious woman known as Nabooru.
Link encounters Nabooru in a desert climate, and she seems to be able to move as capably as him. That’s pretty impressive, given that her waist is about as thick as Link’s upper arm. One swing from his sword or hit from his boomerang could break Nabooru in half.