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  • That Time He Knocked Nightwing's Tooth out on Random Times Batman Was A Major Dick In Comics

    (#4) That Time He Knocked Nightwing's Tooth out

    So apparently Batman never studied denistry?

    In Batman #7, Batman is hot on the heels of The Court of Owl's assassins, the Talons, when he uncovers a secret tying them to Haly's Circus. Suspecting that his former ward, Dick Grayson, might have been selected to join the Talons, Bruce decides that he needs to see if their seal is hidden in one of his molars. Does he ask politely to look in his mouth? Does he explain any of this to Dick first? 

    Nope. That's not how Batman operates. 

    He just hauls off and punches his friend in the face so hard that it knocks to tooth loose and it rattles on the floor. There had to be a nicer way to get that tooth out, Bruce.
  • That Time He Made Robin Dig His Own Grave on Random Times Batman Was A Major Dick In Comics

    (#3) That Time He Made Robin Dig His Own Grave

    Wait, doesn't Batman have a butler who can dig these graves?

    World's Finest #195 features not one, but two superheroes forcing these young boys to dig their own graves before they will kill them. This is something that even the worst mobsters don't do.
  • When He Sucker-Punched a Deity on Random Times Batman Was A Major Dick In Comics

    (#23) When He Sucker-Punched a Deity

    Forager, one of the New Gods, sacrifices himself to save the Justice League and the entire planet Earth. Another of the New Gods, Orion, starts talking trash about Forager in front of Batman. So naturally Batman winds up and sucker-punches a god. Sure, he was defending a man who just saved his life. But this is a god. Batman effectively joepardizes the lives of everyone in the universe.
  • When He Painted Himself Yellow to Bully Green Lantern on Random Times Batman Was A Major Dick In Comics

    (#7) When He Painted Himself Yellow to Bully Green Lantern

    This is like the superhero equivalent of adding insult to injury. Green Lantern has a strange weakness, just as green gives him power (the color of will) yellow weakens him (the color of fear). In All Star Batman and Robin #9, Bats decides to paint both himself and the Boy Wonder. They then proceed to kick the ever loving crap out of Green Lantern just because GL questioned their lifestyle.

    It's like Green Lantern digging up Bruce Wayne's parents and beating him with the corpses.
  • All the Times He Was a Womanizing Liar on Random Times Batman Was A Major Dick In Comics

    (#15) All the Times He Was a Womanizing Liar

    Bruce Wayne has been an international playboy since day one. His freewheeling lifestyle includes fast cars, fast money, and fast sexual exploitation of women. We all know Batman cannot love another woman, but Bruce Wayne has got to get back out there! 

    Becky Cloonan and Olly Moss tackle this in their entry, Bruce, in Batman Black and White #6. The story features a few young socialites discussing their one-night stands with the infamous billionaire. Having sex with them or not, Bruce Wayne is still manipulating these women so that he can keep his secret identity.
  • That Time Batman Was a Big Cat and Attacked Robin on Random Times Batman Was A Major Dick In Comics

    (#22) That Time Batman Was a Big Cat and Attacked Robin

    Robin and big cats just can't get along, can they? Ever the subject of Batman's constant assaults, the cover of Batman #209 has Robin with his back turned to his mentor, who is now a monstrous tiger-man. 

    Pretty dick move, Batman, turning into a tiger-man and then ravaging your young ward. The little fella is likely still traumatized from his time in the jungle with that one panther.

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