Random Jokes | Best Random Tools

Random Jokes

Get random joke(s) from the funniest 5000 jokes.
  •  1. A doctor says to his patient,"Without these treatments, you've got 3 months to live," and hands him a bill.

    The patient says, "My God! Look at all these. I can't come up with this kind of money in 3 months!"

    The doctor says, "Alright! You've got 6 months to live."

  •  2. While robbing a home, a burglar hears someone say, "Jesus is watching you." To his relief, he realizes it is just a parrot mimicking something it had heard.

    The burglar asks the parrot, "What's your name?" The parrot says, "Moses."

    The burglar goes on to ask, "What kind of a person names their parrot Moses?" The parrot replies, "The same kind of person that names his Rottweiler Jesus."

  •  3. One afternoon a little boy was playing outdoors. He used his mother's broom as a horse and had a wonderful time until it was getting dark. He left the broom on the back porch. His mother was cleaning up the kitchen when she realized that her broom was missing. She asked the little boy about the broom and he told her where it was. She then asked him to please go get it. The little boy informed his mom that he was afraid of the dark and didn't want to go out to get the broom. His mother smiled and said 'The Lord is out there too, don't be afraid'. The little boy opened the back door a little and said 'Lord if you're out there, hand me the broom'.

  •  4. How many surrealists does it take to change a lightbulb?

    Two, one to do it, and another to hold the fish.

  •  5. A man walks into a bar and notices two pieces of beef nailed to the ceiling. He asks the barman why they're there. "It's a competition. If you can climb up there and get those bits of meat down you'll get free drinks all night. But if you try and fail then you'll have to buy a round for everyone in the pub. Do you fancy having a go?" The man has a long, hard look at the ceiling before saying, "No, I'll just have a pint thanks. The steaks are too high."

  •  6. A city feller goes to a dude ranch and arrives in the evening. Making conversation with the cow-­‐hand, he asks "Are we going to be driving that bunch of cows over there?" "Herd" is the cowhand's reply. "Heard? Heard of what?" asks the city slicker. "Herd of COWS" replies the cow-­‐hand. "'Course I've heard of cows," says the indignant city dweller. "There's a bunch of 'em right over there!"

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About Random Jokes Tool

Do you often read jokes? Will you joke with your family and friends? Do you want some random jokes to kill time when boring? Worried to the jokes are not funny? We collected the most funny 1000 jokes, these jokes are voted out by people, maybe this joke is not funny, but the next one is absolutely funny. This page generates 6 jokes each time by default, and click the Refresh button to get 6 new ones.

In the meantime, you can generate interesting jokes in the specified amount. We added a small feature, click the joke text with the mouse, it will automatically select the appropriate text, this is a convenient copy tool.

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